Contemplating 

Maybe I’m a tad bit too inhibited, Lord help me flourish… My quest for perfection borders on insanity and has paved a way for a huge disparity between my perceived reality and my actuality.
Leading to self brutality in a bid to suppress my carnality… Why can’t I just be? where from this need to flee from the truth of me?
Is who God made me so far from whom I must be? Does he see me and wonder what be? Does he know me and accept what he sees? I think he sees in 360 degrees all that I am and all that I must be.
Are his eyes loving? Are his hands giving? Is his nature caring? Is his anger flaring? In my contemplation -navigating confusion- here’s my conclusion: his love is no illusion 

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The one

The wait wasn’t long

The pain is all gone 

Now the feelings are so strong

Strange we got it all wrong

I’m glad I didn’t loose you

For life now I choose you

My heart leaps for just you
My spirit resonates with only you

You’re the warmth I longed for 
You’re all the man I prayed for

You uphold the truth I stand for 

We share the Love we live for

Your the one I laugh with

The one I’ll grow with

The one I’ll birth with

The one I’ll build with

Inspired by @jeromeceeez

Mysterious Hunger

My heart is racing again

The tears are flowing again

Lord you’ve given me a balanced life 

Of love, of pain

Of joy and heart ache

One day at a time… I’m holding on

I try not to look so far… Cuz the blurry maze only intensifies the agony of my wait

Every night a new promise is my bread… But bread for the day is all you promise… It’s all I get 

Here I am again

Hungry… Thirsty… Longing…

The mystery of hunger: what do I long for? when will I be satisfied?

For long I focused on the when, but now I wonder what?

Why is this longing so deep?

Seeking Intimacy

jeromeceeez

Life is a sequence of challenges; sometimes it feels like a massive experiment that has handpicked you to be the test case of a series of theories. What is rather peculiar is that your life is the basis of the theories that you are trying to reject or trying to fail to reject. ***Scientifically speaking you don’t accept a theory, you either reject it or fail to reject it*** 🙂

If you are believer like me (and you should be, a believer that is, not necessarily like me) from time to time you will ask God for signs and hints about which side of these theories you should belong to, if you are like me, most of the times you will get answers that leave you fully energised and dedicated to rejecting or failing to reject a theory based on your God given bias

This is all well and good…

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I SURRENDER 

“If you don’t go all the way with me, through thick and thin, you don’t deserve me. If your first concern is to look after yourself, you’ll never find yourself. But if you forget about yourself and look to me, you’ll find both yourself and me.” Matthew‬ ‭10‬:‭38-39‬ MSG)

Seeing relationships through the eyes of the above changes my perspective… So now I’ve found a theory I love and I want to embrace wholeheartedly, but I’m afraid my reality might stifle its practicability… I SURRENDER 
I want to be with you, not for what you can do for me but for what I can do for you. The thought of this is inspiring and potentially liberating. I’m eager to turn our pain into bliss… I SURRENDER
It’s new, it’s old, it’s fresh, it’s cold. Going round in circles with the truth brought me to the place of despair and resignation, but here I am eager to try again… I SURRENDER
The worst pain we experience in life is only exaggerated by our interpretation of reality. We can either be really fortunate or really desolate, reality is subject to your minds creativity… I SURRENDER
I hurt you, you hurt me. I help you, you help me. You’re hurting, I’m healing, I’m hurting, you’re healing. It’s the world we’ve created, what will be, will be… I SURRENDER

Beloved

jeromeceeez

What can I get you that gets you?

Sitting still I speculate silently

Every thought seems insufficient or lacking

Not enough to satisfy my thirst to satisfy

Not enough to satisfy like you satisfy

A glance into your eyes

Through the eyes of my mind

I am retold of all your virtues

An anecdote of stirring virtuoso

Saliently setting sails of satisfaction

Across the streams of spousal

It’s a torrent of getting and not forgetting

You getting me and me getting you

And both of us not forgetting each other

But still I ask, what can I get you that gets you

If I could I would give you everything

And I still won’t know what to get you that gets you

For everything is nothing but anything

So I am back to the conundrum

But this time my thoughts create a tingling vibration

Vectoring towards a victory of revelation

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A God that is Love

jeromeceeez

Your magnitude is evident, everything belongs to You, yet You gave and give liberally, all that belongs to You

We are like books arrayed and abiding in Your timeless library

With our lives and choices interweaving to provide the parchment, where You inscribe into our souls with the ink of eternity

You give us freewill because of the Love You have for us

You allow us be expressive as we debate right or wrong, a scuffle for completeness

You speak gently to our soul, a loud whisper aching to make us whole

You are aware of the intricate web and collision course that is our life

You have given us the torch of love that guides and empowers us to glide through all the strife

It all seems so straightforward; You have all these plans to prosper us

All we have to do is be aligned with Your purpose, obeying…

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